Sucks To Be A Texans Fan

The 2006 draft in my mind will go down as the year that the football gods kick Houston fans in the nads. They wanted the hometown star, Vince Young, would have settled for Heisman Trophy winner Reggie Bush, but end up with Mario Williams. On top of that, the man who took the Oilers away from them ended up with their hometown hero and will play against the Texans twice a year.

So was this a Texas-sized blunder? Will this go down as one of the 100 worst draft picks of all time? To me, this decision just smacks of stupidity. I mean, Charlie Casserly has a history of being a moron. And I really disagree with his choice. If you don't want to take Reggie Bush, I can see that. But then you trade down or take D'Brickashaw Ferguson. I mean, the last offensive tackle taken first overall was Orlando Pace, and he worked out pretty well. The last defensive line player taken first overall: Courtney Brown. He did not work out so good.

This draft was pretty entertaining as they were some surprises, trades, and bonehead decisions. (I'm looking at you, Buffalo.) If you missed me liveblogging, check out this stream of conciousness take on draft day. And here's some random things I picked up from coverage of the first couple rounds:

Personally, I wasn't particularly thrilled with the Bengals top pick. This guy may be great, but he sounds like he's gonna need a lot of work before he makes a positive impact on the field. And then offensive tackle in the second round? I'm not seeing any immediate help from either of them.

I don't know what it is but I can't get enough of Rachel Nichols lately. When she first started showing up on Sportscenter, she just didn't do much for me. But the more I see her, the better and better she looks. Maybe it's because I'm fascinated by a woman who never blinks. I've never seen her do it. Have you?

I was able to flip back and forth between coverage on ESPN and NFL Network. They're a little more critical of the prospects on the NFL's own channel, I was surprised to see. A lot more coach's footage as well as clips from Senior Bowl practices. Still, I was pretty pleased with the inaugural NFL Draft on NFL Network. Not as many bells and whistles but some solid analysis from Rich Eisen and Mike Mayock.

"Not eating meat is a decision. Eating meat is an instinct!"

BSG News

I don't know what the deal was last week, but there was a lot of news that came out about Battlestar Galactica. Apparently, BSG will spin-off Caprica, which is more like a prequel from the sounds of it.

There was also some people doing publicity. Seems kinda early since we won't see new episodes until the fall. But, based on some articles, it looks like gonna be a rough time for Starbuck. Actually, gonna be a rough time for everyone. Sounds like there's some kind of press junket going around which is weird since new episodes don't hit the airwaves for about half a year.

"Killing isn't like smoking. You can stop."

To Mock Or Not To Mock Draft

Another thing I did last year was create my own mock draft and called it the NFL Sock Draft. Yes, very clever. I was planning on repeating that again this year but that also took a good amount of effort. I think I spent the better part of my work week putting that together and since I didn't work this week, no preperation went into creating a mock draft. Sure, I could throw one together but who wants to see that? I tried to sprinkle in some amusing anecdotes to liven it up and have no time for such shenanigans at this late date.

If you absolutely need another possible scenario to digest, check out the Unabated Sports 2006 Mock Draft. We did this in our studio on Tuesday and Jeff, Clinton, and I took turns putting players on teams. I was surprised how long it took considering we only did the first 24 picks. Sure, we did break for commercials but it still lasted just about an hour. No wonder the real thing takes so long. And the pressure really picks up when you're on the clock and you have no idea who you should be taking.

Speaking of no idea who will be taken, don't forget to try Mark's draft contest.

"Everyone knows that gasoline comes from dinosaurs. If we're running out of gas, the solution isn't to drive less, it's to kill more dinosaurs."

To Liveblog or Not To Liveblog

As you can probably tell, I'm getting a bit psyched for this weekend's NFL Draft. As per tradtion, I'll be at the Goat's as we will be glued to the tube for several hours on ESPN. Just like last year. And the Goat has NFL Network so we can flip over to their coverage, too. I'm also thinking of listening to NFL Radio's coverage on NFL.com and ESPN Radio, too. Does that sound like overload to you?

Last year, I liveblogged Day 1right here on the Sock Drawer. It was a neat experience as I think everyone should liveblog something at least once in their blogging career. I've been going back and forth trying to decide if I was going to do that again this year. It was kinda fun and it's real interesting to go back and see my gut reactions to what was going on that day. But it was a surprising amount of work. I was kinda glued to the couch, pecking away at my laptop constantly throughout the afternoon instead of fully taking in the event. Still a day or so to mull it over but I wouldn't expect it at this point.

Here's some highlights from last year's NFL Draft, as seen on my blog:

1:07 MOe has informed us that it is technically against NFL rules to use a horse as a running back.

1:36 The Titans... pick the guy who has a T-shirt wiith his own picture on it. He looks like a character Dave Chappelle is playing. But Pac-Man's got a cool nickname so we'll let it slide.

1:47 Merrill Hodge's hair is NOT in mid-season form.

1:48 Johnny thinks Mel looks like Sam the Eagle from the Muppets.

2:03 Our first erectile dysfunction commercial. Good thing they waited until the kids are in bed before showing it.

3:22 Tonight, a Pay Per View Event, pay $30 to watch some guy you never heard of fight another no-name!

3:28 I don't understand advertisers who show how cool their product can make their environment when it's so damn cold outside! The last thing I want right now is a beer that freezes over everything in the room when it's already snowing!

4:33 Amy alluded to the fact that Fabian Washington being black and going to Nebraska, the guy must be able to run. And we here at the Sock Drawer appreciate all of our Nebraska readers. Send all hate mail to Amy, please.

5:09 Johnny is thrilled to hear the ESPN folk insult Seattle receivers. He's poised to throw his hat at the screen.

5:10 He threw some food instead.

So that's the kind of excitement you can expect if I hunker down and type out the reactions from our war room this weekend. More than likely, I will probably do some kind of overall entry I contribute to throughout the day as opposed to full-on liveblogging. Yeah, that sounds much better for my lazy ass.

"I've quit better jobs than this."

Sometimes, I Want To Make People Think I Am A Stone Cold Pimp

Woody & The Cheerleaders


Originally uploaded by Unabated Sports.

So I post a picture like this one to give off that illusion. This was what my weekend was like. Okay, not the whole weekend but I did get to enjoy a lovely spring afternoon watching football and cheerleaders. Although, I did come away with a bit of sunburn. Here's my pictures from the UC Spring Game. And no, they're not all of cheerleaders. I got a new camera and it has been working very well early on. Let's see if that keeps up or it's just the fact that I'm a moron when it comes to being a photographer.

"Don't wait for it to happen. Don't even want it to happen. Just see what does happen."

Join The Mockumental Fun!

Tomorrow on our Unabated Sports radio show, we're going to create our own NFL draft simulation. I and the two other hosts will pick players for different teams. If you want a voice for your team, you should send us an email at unabatedsports@gmail.com so we can include a fan's choice for their team. We're only going up to the 24th overall pick (the Bengals) so we won't touch on teams who survived the first weekend of the playoffs. Sorry, Goat. But I know there are a couple of readers who follow other teams choosing in the top two thirds of the first round. Just put a list of about five guys you want to see your team pick and we'll take whoever's available. It wouldn't hurt to rank them so we know which you prefer if multiple guys are still on the board. Also, the farther down the draft order your team is, the more choices you may want to put down. We go on the air at 4:00 p.m. eastern time so the deadline is approaching. Your team is on the clock. Who do you want them to take?

"Any suggestions?"
"Get up. Move faster."
"Move faster. Great idea."

Halloween In April?!

Aprilween
Originally uploaded by Woodmania.

The brand new holiday of Aprilween was recently celebrated in Columbus. Definitely a good time at Bryan and Gretchen's as they and their neighbors know how to throw a good shindig. You can see more Flickr pics from the Aprilween party. Keep checking it, I'll be putting up some pictures as time and memory permit. But Aprilween wasn't just in Columbus. There are others who took part, as well. Not a lot from the looks of it, though. It doesn't seem like it's taking the nation by storm, yet. Hopefully, it will catch on. As a man, I can only hope there are more days on the calender for women to dress as a french maid or cheerleader or twisted versions of fairy tale characters. Yes, I revel in my pigness.

Franz
Originally uploaded by Woodmania.

I technically took part in the Aprilween festivities, but was pretty lame in my costume. Yeah, Hanz from the classic Satuday Night Live sketch. Not a bad idea suggest by Moe's brother, Daniel, who was looking for someone to go as Franz. That's him in the giant foam cowboy hat above. So, obviously that plan didn't pan out. When he changed his mind earlier in the week, however, I was too lazy to change my costume idea. And when I got to the party, I was too lazy to stuff my sweatsuit with towels. So, I had no muscles and no work-out partner. Pretty half-assed. I've done this costume before so maybe I was resting on my laurels. I thouht my fancy cardboard belt would impress but that didn't happen. I have a lot to make up for when Halloween comes around in the fall.

"As Prometheus said to the Athenians, 'I need another beer'."

Quiet Off-Season Here on the Sock Drawer

As you may have guessed from yesterday's post, it's going to be pretty football-intensive here for about the next week. Sorry to you non-pigskin fans but I think I've been pretty good in 2006. Especially compared to last year when I would throw out mock drafts every week and contstantly discuss free agent developments in the NFL, I've been really quiet. Part of it was the whole collective bargaining debate this winter that looked like it might really taint the best league in the world. It was no fun listening to all that crap so I didn't get too enthused about that kind of talk, and the league as a whole. Also, I got the impression that some people didn't want daily updates on what some schmuck with a website thinks some team you don't care about picks some player you don't know. As we get ready for this weekend's NFL Draft, here's some interesting bits I've seen as I've been scouring the net the last few days.

It looks like Bryant Gumbel and Cris Collinsworth will do the NFL Network game. Interesting choices. Obviously, Collinsworth was a big shot at Fox so that doesn't surprise me. But Gumbel? Very interesting. He hasn't been actively involved in sports for a couple decades so it'll be intriguing to see if he can still do it. In the article, they suggest Gumbel was selected to give the NFL Network some clout and name recognition with advertisers. I can see that. But if I hear one more time than an announcer is being selected to draw in viewers, I'm gonna slap them. I have never in my life ever talked to someone who decided to watch a game or not watch it based on an announcer.

As I've been doing lots of prep-work for this weekend, I found something called the draft rating index. It basically grades how well your team does in the lottery. And the Bengals are at the top?! Wow, how times have changed.

And don't forget to take part in Mark's draft contest. All you do is say who you think your favorite team will take and you win... um, I don't think there's any prizes except for bragging rights. But I need anything I can get so that will work for me.

"Well, I have a microphone, and you don't, so you will listen to every damn word I have to say!"

MySpace Mylestones

My struggling MySpace page seems to finally be getting some momentum. I just made my 30th friend on there this week. It doesn't sound like much, but that's considerable progress for me. Hell, it took over four months just to get 200 views. I'm closing in on 350 now so the pace has certainly picked up a lot in the last few weeks. A lot of the recent friends have been former co-workers for different jobs who have tracked me down again. A few high school friends have also said hello, the first time I had talked to them in a few years. (Yeah, I didn't go to my reunion so I haven't caught up with pretty much everyone.)

I did notice that the jump in people viewing my page corresponded with some changes I made. First, I removed everyone from my friends page who's profile picture was just an ass in a thong. Second, I started blogging on there. (And by blogging, I mean posting stuff I wrote here over there, as well. I can barely get original content on here, let alone another site.) I don't know which one made more of an impact but I don't think the rise in viewership around the same time is a coincidence.

By the way, I am celebrating another big milestone tomorrow. First one to guess why May 4th is a big deal around these parts gets a point for the quote contest.

Take That, George Lucas

I already talked about this before but I have YouTubed this now. This was something I threw together before the Serenity movie came out. I was hoping this could have been something to help bring some unenlightened folks to see the movie. Unfortunately, the movie did not do well. I don't think it was a coincidence that this did not get picked up by Browncoars and used as a promotional tool. Or maybe it's because it's just not that good. Probably the latter.
"You know what's remarkable? That England looks in no way like Southern California."

Looks Like I Missed One

I listed a couple pseudo-holidays that occur on a normal-looking non-descript day. Apparently, yesterday was also National Look-Alike Day, as well. I never really felt like I looked like any celebrity, although a passing resemblence to the guy from Cheers gave me my nickname back in high school. I get a lot of people saying I remind them of someone in real life, but not anyone famous? Anyone think of a celeb I do resemble? (Yeah, that didn't open the door for me to be insulted and dissed, now did it?) Do you look like anyone?

It was also Love-A-Teen day? Yeah, that sounds wrong.

"You know what? You just gave me something to think about."
"I'm sorry, I hate it when someone does that to me."

Happy... Um... Holidays?

With so many holidays and landmarks on the calendar, it's hard to keep track of what we need to observe on a day to day basis. Most of you probably know this but some people celebrate April 20th as 420. I guess you're supposed to grab a "pack o' wraps, my brotherman. Time to kick back, drink some beers and shmoke some weed!" (No, that's not today's quote. It's from Clerks and it's too easy. Although, a lot of easy ones have been slipping by so far undeclared.) Of course, me being out of the loop so much, I barely heard some chatter about today and had to be flat out told by a friend to finally put the pieces together. Any other hip, trendy holidays out there that I should know about?

If you have to pass a drug test at some point in the near future, you can still celebrate something since today is also National High Five Day. Come on, don't leave me hanging.

"You ever see the back of a twenty dollar bill... on weed? Oh, there's some crazy shit, man. There's a dude in the bushes. Has he got a gun? I dunno!"

Just To Confirm That, Yes, I Am A Total Nerd

I admit that I've been enjoying the latest installment of Dr. Who, a show that I picked up and enjoyed as a wee lad. I spent today poking around the internet, trying to remember all the different aspects of the Doctor's history. Yes, I'm a big nerd, but not big enough to remember how many times he faced off against the Master and what was inside the Dalek's outer casing. While cruising around the Wikipedioa entry, I came upon something I did not know. No, not something like how many times Time Lords can regenerate or why Tom Baker refused to participate in the Five Doctors reunion show. Something that someone might actually find interesting: Douglas Adams worked on Doctor Who. Am I the only one who know that or the only one who cares?

"Nice to meet you, Rose. Run for your life!"

Damned If You Do, Damned If You Bauer

From the Movie Blog: Keifer Sutherland has confirmed a '24' movie is in the works. The obvious question becomes the movie's format: will it be in real time? It would seem pretty dumb for the franchise to abandon what has worked so well on TV. Then again, if the movie doesn't represent a 24-hour time period, the title "24" doesn't really make a lot of sense, do it?

"Your stunned silence is very reassuring."

Bunny Nap

Taking a look around the internet, it looks like folks are definitely taking the weekend off. So, in honor of the holiday weekend, I'll mail one in today, too. Actually, let's make a theme of the whole weekend here at the Sock Drawer. Looks like it's a clip from Pablo Francisco and his patented take on the movie preview guy. Enjoy!

"Don't you understand that every day's a rerun and the laughter's always canned."

Ninjacasts

Rinnert sent me a link to a cool little web series I had to pass along: Ask A Ninja. It's equal in it's goodness to that classic Master Ninja Theme Song! Although it looks like there are many more Ask A Ninjas episodes than the late John Peter McAllister classic, The Master. If only Rinnert had a blog, than he could share these nuggets that he's always finding. Instead, I'm ripping off his discoveries and passing them on as my own. Below the quote is the one he pointed me to that is like a lightning round of ninjaness.

"Cause those Van Patten brothers are so headstrong!"

It's Not In The Mix

I saw something very strange in the grocery store today: Simply Chex. If it looks like Chex Mix without the Mix to you, that's what it is. No pretzels, crackers, peanuts or any of that other crazy stuff they've been putting in lately.
Considering how much I love party mixes, I had to give this a try. Probably the largest complaint I have about mixes, as a whole, is too much of the other ingredients. It's pretty ironic that my complaint about this product is the complete lack of anything else. I don't like too much "Mix" and I don't like "Simply" Chex. Maybe what I need to do is buy one bag of each, mix them together, and finally get that balance I've been craving for so long.

Worst Proposal Ever

You know what I'm talking about if you saw this week's LOST. I was planning on doing a post one day about unusual marriage proposals. No matter how you do it, I can't imagine a worse respone than the one Rose gave Bernard when he got down on one knee and asked for her hand in marriage. I'd go into it further, but don't want to spoil it for those who haven't seen it yet. I don't think it was a major spoiler that I revealed that Rose and Bernard were married. Right?

"Plaque is a figment of the liberal media and the dental industry to scare you into buying useless appliances and pastes."

Black and Caucasian-American

So, I'm watching ESPN's coverage of the Duke Lacrosse Team rape scandal and there was something that bothered me. As a follow-up, they were describing the racial undertones of the case and how the demographics of Durham play a role. They talk about how about half of the citizens are "white" and 40% are "African-American." I undertand if you're gonna go PC, but you need to go both ways. Please refer to my people as Cracker-Americans.

"Watch the face! I need that for acting!"

Blogging From Outdoors

I don't know if I mentioned this before but I'm of a mind to think this here internet thing might just about be one of the keenest things mankind has invented since the whole wheel thing. And being able to access the web wirelessly? Oh, don't get me started. In fact, I'm sitting outside typing up these thoughts, soaking up some sun. Being able to be online, but not stuck in a crappy, dark apartment on a day like today? Priceless.

But, if I'm gonna make a habit of this, some things are gonna change. First, this lawn chair is pretty darm uncomfortable. I'm gonna have to get me one of them fancy camping chairs or something. You know, the ones with the cupholders built in? Second, what can I do to make it easier to see the screen? Is there a certain angle I need to sit? Or is it just unreasonable to be in the sunshine, yet still in the glow of cyberspace?

"Hey, here's an idea: why don't you morph into a guy with something interesting to talk about?"

Oh, That's Nasty

I finally got my scanner plugged in so I figured I would give it a test run today. I'm gonna post something and take it out of context. You've seen this thing on a lot of other sites, especially comic blogs. But I'm certainly not above swiping other people's material. I'm going with a comic book caption that I clearly took in a very wrong direction. It involves Mandarin, a bad guy with a penchant for rings. But he's still a badass. Dave thinks so: "The Mandarin wears ten strange rings of alien origin, each with its own super-power. Any one of those rings would be enough power for most villains, but Mandy wears all ten at the same time, making him insanely powerful. Seriously, The Mandarin could kill Superman. And his dog."

Anyway, in Marvel Team Up #19, Mandy gets his hands on a special rock that he wants to harness. Eleven rings? But you've only got ten fingers. Where are you going to put the eleventh... Oh, Mandarin! That's not right!

"Kinky. But I like my sex the way I play basketball, one on one with as little dribbling as possible."

Stinky Fish In The Sea

It's any wonder at all that women would try something as risky as online dating. There are a lot of weirdos out that, even weirder than me. For example, take this crazy cop on Match:

Officer Michael Valentine met the woman on Match.com last November and dated her for about six weeks before she broke up with him. He went into her account and, posing as her, sent himself an e-mail threatening that her friends would "come out of the bushes with a baseball bat and beat your brains in," prosecutors said. He also sent Match.com messages to 70 men on the dating service to falsely indicate she was romantically interested in them.

Wow. That must explain why women tell me their interested in me, then never reply to any of my emails. The same thing must have happened to all of them!

"I can't believe I actually died for this war."

YouTube Hangover

I was planning on having a special theme week here but I think I'm gonna push it off to tomorrow. Over at the Movie Blog, they had a few things grab my attention. That sent me over to YouTube where I wasted a lot of time being thoroughly entertained. First off, the big news this weekend was the Simpsons movie teaser. So, I guess that means there's going to be a Simpsons movie. July 27th, next year. Will you be there? Will it wreck the show? Is there anything left to wreck?

One movie I did know about that gave us a little more of a look is the sequel to Kevin Smith's directorial debut. Enjoy the Clerks 2 trailer, complete with curse words. Looks pretty amusing and Rosario Dawson looks pretty hot. I was never really a big fan of hers before. Don't know what my problem was but I have a feeling this movie will change that.

And if you wanna go a little old school, here's something done by someone clever. Check out the original Clerks movie trailer but animated... kinda. The used footage from the cartoon and used it over the audio of the original trailer. Very well done.

"What would you get for a six-year-old who chronically wets his bed?"

About Damn Time

Sure, Johnny and Amy are about to have a baby, but I finally got around to fixing something that was wrong in their wedding video I edited. Only a few years too late. This isn't the wedding itself, but the wedding rehearsal. I can tell the difference because we weren't as dressed up and the day of the actual wedding was probably forty degrees warmer.

"All the dishes rattle in the cupboards when the elephants arrive."

Fan Film Friday: 28 Day Slater

It's been a looong time since my last Fan Film Friday review. I thought it was gonna take something that really spoke to me on a personal level to get me back. Little did I realize that the source material for the Fan Film would be Saved By The Bell.

FF type: Short Story
Apparently, Mario Lopez is not adapting very well to his post-SBTB life. He's slipped back into his AC Slater persona and it has mixed results in the real world.

Production Quality: (4) Looks like a pretty well shot and edited work. Not technically spectacular, but it creates the appropriate settings and doesn't hamper the overall effect. Loved the "live studio audience" effects they brought over from the show. Nice attention to detail.

Performances: (4) Very good impression of A.C. Slater. At times, I was wondering if Mario Lopez himself was replaying his role.

Fan quotient: (4) The premise is explained in the opening theme song so you shouldn't be too lost. Besides, if you lived in America in the last fifteen years and even walked by a TV at some point, how could you not have seen this show?

Entertainment Value: (5) Definitely good fun. Whether you loved the show or hated it, you'll appreciate this one.

FF obtainment: (4) I found it through FARK. It's from the folks at Channel 102. And you can see it on YouTube. Or right here on this site. Hmmm... YouTube might make it necessary to re-evaluate how this category is judged.

28 Day Slater: 21 out of 25.

Wow. Who would've thought something based on a show that infuriates every cell of my body would score so high with me. I guess it doesn't hurt that this piece pokes fun of the Bell Universe.



"By the time I grab my books and I give myself a look, I'm at the corner just in time to see the bus fly by"

Myth: Wolves Are Dangerous To Humans

Here's something to laugh at instead of going out into the world and being succeptible to someone's cruel, cruel April Fools joke. Enjoy these PSAs from NBC's The Office.

Or, if you came here looking for something educational: the history of April Fools. Although, the Office stuff is definitely funnier.

"Eating six Saltines in under a minute may sound like a lot of fun..."