Dating Week!
It's Dating Week here at the Sock Drawer! Well, it will be if I can actually meet a deadline each and every day and bring up new obersvations about the shark-infested waters that is the dating pool. Go ahead and take bets on whether I can accomplish this, but the plan is to bring up something every day until Friday about my newfound single experiences. Some leave me gasping for more. Some leave me running for the door. At the very least, it's been a learning experience. And I would like to pass on some of that knowledge to anyone who's brave enough to read about them.
Okay, today I'll talk about online dating. I've been using a website or two to meet lovely suitor-ettes. Sure, it's got a certain stigma to it but, let's face it, I wouldn't meet anyone without them. Anyway, on these sites, you are encouraged to put a picture on your profile to draw more interest. It makes sense, as we humans are superficial creatures. Especially guys. Especially me. Anyway, I sometimes look at profiles and wonder what these people are thinking when they post these pictures So, I would like to offer some advice to those who already have profiles or are considering doing so.
First, eliminate technical problems. Don't waste your time and ours by putting up blurry photos or those where you only comprise a small portion of the frame. Sure, it helps get across the point that you like to hike and be outdoorsy. But do I want to date you or the Grand Canyon behind you? Again, these pictures can round out a personal portfolio of multiple pictures but you better come with more than that.
Second, beware group shots. Again, these are nice to include because, oftentimes, these are pretty candid and show off a big smile. But you can literally get lost in the crowd. You probably don't want to make us guys try to look through all those people and try to pick you out. We may get distracted by the other ladies in the picture. Which brings up a good point, do not put up one of you with a friend who is hotter than you. Do put up the one where you're next to your ugly friend. Obviously, this makes you look better by comparison. But don't put it up if the ugly person in question is your sister or cousin or other relative. We don't want that kind of ugly, even if it's only a recessive gene in you.
Third, no pets. I understand that your cat or dog or alligator or whatever is a big part of your life. But I want to see pictures of the person in the profile, not their four-legged friend. Certainly, a picture of you and your pet together is acceptable and does a much better job of conveying your love for your animal than a picture of it asleep on your couch.
Fourth, avoid pictures taken by professionals. This might just be a personal guideline, because these kind of pictures raise a red flag with me. I automatically suspect the profile is false and is placed there by some cyber-practical joker or a spammer to lure me to some strange site. Besides, why would a professional model need a website to meet guys? It's like: what does God need with a starship? (Bonus quote point for whoever knows that last sentence.) The internet's only for the rest of us. If the picture you've posted is your senior pictures, dump them. Everyone looks great in those things and you were 17 years old when you posed for them. A lot of changes can occur between then and now and most of them aren't flattering.
Lastly, do not put up your best picture. I think the other guidelines were pretty self-explanatory and this would seem to be a foolish suggestion. After all, the better the picture, the more guys who will show interest in you and your profile. But unless you can recreate that look in person, don't share it. You will only be dissappointing the fellow once he actually meets you.
I think those are the big ones. Anyone disagree with them? Agree with them? Have any more to add? Tomorrow, I take on texting.
"Can't you call me the 'second suitor'? Suitor number two sounds like a bathroom code."
Okay, today I'll talk about online dating. I've been using a website or two to meet lovely suitor-ettes. Sure, it's got a certain stigma to it but, let's face it, I wouldn't meet anyone without them. Anyway, on these sites, you are encouraged to put a picture on your profile to draw more interest. It makes sense, as we humans are superficial creatures. Especially guys. Especially me. Anyway, I sometimes look at profiles and wonder what these people are thinking when they post these pictures So, I would like to offer some advice to those who already have profiles or are considering doing so.
First, eliminate technical problems. Don't waste your time and ours by putting up blurry photos or those where you only comprise a small portion of the frame. Sure, it helps get across the point that you like to hike and be outdoorsy. But do I want to date you or the Grand Canyon behind you? Again, these pictures can round out a personal portfolio of multiple pictures but you better come with more than that.
Second, beware group shots. Again, these are nice to include because, oftentimes, these are pretty candid and show off a big smile. But you can literally get lost in the crowd. You probably don't want to make us guys try to look through all those people and try to pick you out. We may get distracted by the other ladies in the picture. Which brings up a good point, do not put up one of you with a friend who is hotter than you. Do put up the one where you're next to your ugly friend. Obviously, this makes you look better by comparison. But don't put it up if the ugly person in question is your sister or cousin or other relative. We don't want that kind of ugly, even if it's only a recessive gene in you.
Third, no pets. I understand that your cat or dog or alligator or whatever is a big part of your life. But I want to see pictures of the person in the profile, not their four-legged friend. Certainly, a picture of you and your pet together is acceptable and does a much better job of conveying your love for your animal than a picture of it asleep on your couch.
Fourth, avoid pictures taken by professionals. This might just be a personal guideline, because these kind of pictures raise a red flag with me. I automatically suspect the profile is false and is placed there by some cyber-practical joker or a spammer to lure me to some strange site. Besides, why would a professional model need a website to meet guys? It's like: what does God need with a starship? (Bonus quote point for whoever knows that last sentence.) The internet's only for the rest of us. If the picture you've posted is your senior pictures, dump them. Everyone looks great in those things and you were 17 years old when you posed for them. A lot of changes can occur between then and now and most of them aren't flattering.
Lastly, do not put up your best picture. I think the other guidelines were pretty self-explanatory and this would seem to be a foolish suggestion. After all, the better the picture, the more guys who will show interest in you and your profile. But unless you can recreate that look in person, don't share it. You will only be dissappointing the fellow once he actually meets you.
I think those are the big ones. Anyone disagree with them? Agree with them? Have any more to add? Tomorrow, I take on texting.
"Can't you call me the 'second suitor'? Suitor number two sounds like a bathroom code."
posted by Woody! at 9:29 AM
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